and i am constantly finding myself being lost between thoughts of things undone…you – me undone, this- that undone. You left me undone, lost in this delirium of the love you gave me…that fake love, that fake sensation of completion! You were there one day, two days, three-four-five days. And then? NOW? where the fuck are you…
you opened a great door, a big room with wonders and freaks and beauty and chaos, you could lead me through that door…why didn’t you? Where are you? do you ever think of me? Were those words you told me true? Did i mean anything to you?
I am lost here and there, i think i am as lost as you are. But you don’t let me in! You exclude me! It’s your choice no gain in trying to change that. You’ ll never know how i felt…most probably i ll never tell you.
The feeling? What’s the feeling? What do you feel? Do you feel anything? I don’t! Life is a sequence of situations, over and over again! It makes you forget, it helps you be automated like a machine, no feelings, just deliberately emotionless, void, like a lie, like a temporarily living lie.
Try to resist, try to be true and honest and direct..control yourself! Release your emotions that define you.