Leon Tolstoy had once wondered about why do people want to stupify themselves? Why do you seek alcohol, pot, LSD, shrooms, or anything your imagination is able to reach? Why is that even more intense during holidays-fests-vacations?
His thoughts path lead him into making the conclusion that WE-humans try to forget, try to hide from the truth- from ourselves (to be honest). We seek for the means that will carry us away from our problems or that will blind our minds… because all this thinking is a real torture’ the inadequacy you feel’ the feeling of disappointment! “Man you did do everything wrong so far”. “HAHA! Look at you! You 30 and got no job! Sut!”.
How often has your fucking brain imposed such questions on you? How do you react? A cigarette will calm your nerves for sure. What about a glass of wine? What about a pill of Prozak? “Calm my man, it ‘ll all get better soon! Give it a moment and you will feel everything less important! You may even forget some stuff!”.
Isn’t that so?! Some times you need to hide from something! You need to forget! Or you need to feel free and act like noone is looking or like you are another person! Of course, we all know the feeling…
That’s how Tolstoy received that so many years ago and that’s how i perceive it. If you try to explain it yourself, you’ ll see it clearly. It’s not your psysical condition-it’s not your natural insticts that lead you into substance abuse. It starts as being a social condition but then you get sweetened by it! Reality seems a far away torture…you better live in the illusions and in your drunk impulses…
I am not your mommy or daddy, I am noone as a matter of fact but i do know that as long as we get carried away from our “pains” and “dark thoughts” of “kingdoms” that were never discovered and were never ruled, we will never be able to make our unique path…to create our life as we want it. We will always avoid it. AVOID LIFE. AVOID OUR BEING. WHY DO THAT?
take care my lovers